My First Customer

Before I fully published this website on the Internet, I did something I would usually never EVER do...

I talked about it IRL.

Ugh! It's already been done, but just the thought of discussing anything I do on the Internet with the people of the real world is gag-inducing.

I guess it shouldn't, but idk I like to keep parts of myself separate and compartmentalized.

Regardless, one of my coworkers actually asked me to make a site layout for her! She's a big K-pop stan, and she basically wanted an About page styled like a police report. She already had templates in mind and just wanted me to copy them.

It was my first taste of what I assume freelance web design is like??? Whatever. After a bit of procrastination, I made the template and even went through the effort of making stamps for her socials and making it look good for desktop and mobile.

She loved it! I had to teach her how to sign up for Neocities to host and edit it, but she was happy. I was kind of hoping for it to be more of a magical experience, but it was just kind of like "Wow, this doesn't look totally ass. Way to go me."

Maybe it's because I wasn't really challenged and didn't have to make some fantastical layout, but I just felt a mundane version of accomplishment.

It could just be that I'm not giving myself enough slack to enjoy it. Not even two months ago, I didn't know the difference between HTML and CSS, and now I'm at a point where not only can I make a site, but someone else wants me to make one for them!

I should be proud! I should be elated! Why must I be so hard on myself?!

Le sigh... I am a bit happy, even if it's kind of hard to admit. It's been genuinely flattering to have friends and coworkers compliment my work.

I still get a nagging in my head that it's not good enough. It really sucks when the only person disappointed with your work is you.

Luckily, I learn new tricks and get inspired every day. So I just tell myself that if this page looks awful, then at least my next one will look better. Hopefully, I'll make a page that won't make me doubt myself someday.